HORROR MOVIE TIPS, SUP

1. The first time you hear a noise, get the fuck out of dodge.
2. Never go anywhere alone
3. Always wield a weapon, a cell phone, and a redbull
4. Don’t get out the car
5. Don’t go to the house closest to you looking for help
6. Don’t be black. You’ll get killed, no matter what you do. (I’m kidding)
7. No matter what, you’re a virgin. Even if you are a slut, for tonight you are a holy-god-fearing-bible-reading-sunday-school-going virgin.
8. Don’t try to kill the killer, unless you know you’re the one who’s going to survive. (Which you don’t - so don’t risk it)
9. Don’t hide under the bed, in the bathroom/shower, in the closet or anywhere obvious.
10. Be ruthless, sure you’re with your friends, but for the moment, it’s either you or them. Remember, YOU always come first.