I hate that you make me out to be the bad person in this situation. 

Sorry Helga and I dumped out the bucket of 'cute' things you gave me in the parking lot of residence.

Sorry we posted a picture of you on the bulletin board at school and wrote 'ra's suck' when we moved out.

Sorry the last time we talked you treated me like shit. Sorry I had reason to do those things, as immature as they were.

Sorry I wouldn't take you back after you broke up with me for the second time.

Sorry I moved on, without the intention of doing so. 

Sorry I got over you faster then you got over me.

Sorry you're trying to replace me, while I'm trying to erase you. 

Sorry I never could put my trust in you after everything.

I hate that you refer to him as the 'hot douchebag', while you call yourself the 'nice guy'

Sorry you don't even know him at all.

Sorry that making judgments about someone else makes you look like the douche bag.

Sorry that you talk shit about him, while, even though he has reason to, never says anything bad about you.

Sorry that you're blind to the fact he's nicer than you anyway.